Shortest & Funniest Jokes

The trouble with being punctual is that no one is there to appreciate it.

If you keep your feet firmly on the ground, you’ll have trouble,

putting on your pants.

I couldn’t repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.

A friend in need is a pest indeed.

Marriage is one of the chief causes of divorce.

Work is fine if it doesn’t take too much of your time.

When everything comes in your way you’re in the wrong lane.

The light at the end of the tunnel may be an incoming train..

Born free, taxed to death.

Everyone has a photographic memory, some just don’t have film.

Life is unsure; always eat your dessert first.

Smile, it makes people wonder what you are thinking.

It’s not hard to meet expenses, they are everywhere.

I love being a writer… what I can’t stand is the paperwork.

A printer consists of 3 main parts: the case, the jammed paper tray and the blinking red light.

The guy who invented the first wheel was an idiot. The guy who invented the other three, he was the genius.

In a country of free speech, why are there phone bills?

If you cannot change your mind, are you sure you have one?

Beat the 5 O’clock rush, leave work at noon!

If you can’t convince them, confuse them.

It’s not the fall that kills you. It’s the sudden stop at the end.

Hot glass looks same as cold glass. – Cunino’s Law of Burnt Fingers

The cigarette does the smoking you are just the sucker.

Someday is not a day of the week



10 Responses to Shortest & Funniest Jokes

  1. Goldypearl August 13, 2011 at 9:44 PM #

    they are not funny, they are wise.

  2. Junedayz August 13, 2011 at 6:41 PM #

    hahha! most of them are true though!

  3. Ghassane Jammal August 13, 2011 at 12:26 AM #

    very nice quotes! thank you sara 🙂

    • Ali August 13, 2011 at 9:04 AM #

      Thanks Ghassane.

  4. mustafa August 12, 2011 at 8:54 PM #

    some are quite good

    but i prefer long stories

  5. YusefQasemQufaanAl-Yemeni August 12, 2011 at 8:19 PM #

    lmaooo really liked MOST of them lol
    thanks 😛

  6. Anonymous August 12, 2011 at 1:06 PM #

    Very nice and true ;D

  7. Stephen August 12, 2011 at 8:46 AM #

    The most I loved was the incoming train, as I hv always heard, be patient, there will be light at the end of the tunnel & here comes a train & all yr problems are solved

    • Guest August 12, 2011 at 12:55 PM #

      The train will not solve your problems but might kill you.

  8. fathimabintabdurrahman August 12, 2011 at 8:14 AM #

    these ar’nt joke but tru facts  man