Wife Wants Vegetables – Joke

Joke 1

Wife Wants Vegetables 

Sandy said to his friend Ron, ‘My wife sent me to the greengrocer’s to buy some green vegetables.”

‘So were you able to find some?” asked Ron.

‘Well, when I reached the shop, I asked the manager, ‘My wife wants some green vegetables.Have they been sprayed with any harmful chemicals?”

Sandy continued, ‘The shopkeeper told me, ‘No, why don’t you do it yourself.’

Joke 2

Salary Raise 

Employee: Excuse me sir, may I talk to you?

Boss: Sure, come on in. What can I do for you?

Employee: Well sir, as you know, I have been an employee of this prestigious Firm for over ten years.

Boss: Yes.

Employee: I won’t beat around the bush. Sir, I would like a raise. I currently have four companies after me and so I decided to talk to you first. 

Boss: A raise? I would love to give you a raise, but this is just not the right time. 

Employee: I understand your position, and I know that the current economic down turn has had a negative impact on sales, but you must also take into consideration my hard work, pro- activeness and loyalty to this company for over a decade.

Boss: Taking into account these factors, and considering I don’t want to start a brain drain, I’m willing to offer you a ten percent raise and an extra five days of vacation time. How does that sound? 

Employee: Great! It’s a deal! Thank you, sir!

Boss: Before you go, just out of curiosity, what companies were after you? 

Employee: Oh, the Electric Company, Gas Company, Water Company And the Mortgage Company!