The Taxi Driver
A taxi passenger tapped the driver on the shoulder to ask him a question. The driver screamed, lost control of the car, nearly hit a bus, went up on the sidewalk, and stopped inches from a shop window. For a second everything went quiet in the cab, then the driver said, “Look mate, don’t ever do that again. You scared the daylights out of me!”
The passenger apologized and said, “I didn’t realize that a little tap would scare you so much.”
The driver replied, “Sorry, it’s not really your fault. Today is my first day as a cab driver – I’ve been driving a funeral van for the last 25 years.
A husband went to the police station to file a “missing person” report for his
Husband: I lost my wife, she went shopping hasn’t come back yet.
Inspector: What is her height ?
Husband: I never checked.
Inspector: Slim or healthy ?.
Husband: Not slim , maybe she is healthy.
Inspector: Color of eyes ?
Husband: Never noticed.
Inspector: Color of hair ?
Husband: Changes according to season.
Inspector: What was she wearing?
Husband: Not sure . It may have been a dress or maybe a suit.
Inspector: Was she driving?
Inspector: Tell me the type color of the car ?
Husband: A black Audi A8 with supercharged 3.0 litre V6 engine generating
333 horse power teamed with an eight-speed tiptronic automatic
transmission with manual mode. It has full LED headlights, which
use light emitting diodes for all light functions. It has a very thin
scratch on the front left door.….and then the husband started crying…
Inspector: Don’t worry sir ! We will find your car !